I was recently contacted by a group wanting me to write a post for them and their site. They told me they were drawn to me by the honesty in my writing about this crazy, messed up life I lead.
It's not the first time someone has requested to work with me for that reason and I am beyond flattered.
This blog is just a place for me to anonymously dump my word vomit. It's a place for me to express my feelings without it causing a fight, or having to treat lightly. It has turned into a sanctuary of sorts when things get really crazy and a place I hide from when I feel ashamed of what I'm feeling. But I always come back and share those feelings anyway.
I don't want anyone, caregiver, spouse, significant other, parent, friend or other to ever feel they are on their journey alone. I spent years wondering what was wrong with me to have such a messed up marriage. Then I spent ages pretending I didn't see what was going on. Then I allowed my husband to act like nothing was wrong for longer than I should have. And I felt utterly alone every step of the way. I had no one to talk to, I had no one to understand and I am still not allowed to tell people.
I never want anyone to feel alone. And if just one person reads this blog one time and says, "I feel that way too." And can do so while feeling relived that someone else not only feels that way, but understands completely, then it will all be worth pouring my heart out here.
Sometimes I think I share too much. Other times, not enough. But over all, I pledged to be honest with myself when I started this blog. And I'm flattered to see that that honestly is drawing people in and making them want to work with me. And I truly hope that being SO honest might help someone out there who just needs someone to understand the secret life they are living with their significant other behind closed doors.